Why Silence Fuels Backlash — And How 3 Public Figures Fell Into the Trap
I'm a crisis manager who is fascinated by the psychology behind "digging in" — and why it never seem to work
The Silent Treatment: Why Digging In Fuels Backlash
We’ve all been there—that split second after a mistake when your gut screams, Just push harder. Defend. Explain. Fix it. It’s the instinct to dig in, to double down, to protect the ego at all costs. And it’s almost always the wrong move.
From billion-dollar corporate blunders to cringe-worthy celebrity meltdowns, history is littered with examples of smart people making dumb defenses.
Why?
Because admitting fault feels like surrender.
But here’s the truth: The faster you face the mistake, the faster you control the narrative.
Three Viral Moments Where Digging In Backfired
BILL BELICHICK’S SILENT SPIRAL
The Mistake:
A legedary NFL coach is suddenly the talk of the internet—not for his playbook, but for his personal life. After a messy Patriots exit and a surprise move to UNC, Belichick’s refusal to address his high-profile relationship with a much younger influencer has turned him into a tabloid fixture. Probably a place the curmudgeon coach never expected to find himself in.
The Double Down:
Instead of leaning into curiosity about his next chapter, Belichick is:
Dodging real questions in book interviews. Did you know that CBS interview was about his book?
Letting 23-year-old Jordan Hudson dominate his brand (and the spotlight, perhaps?) while he stays silent.
Pretending nothing’s changed—even as his brand shifts from "no distractions" to the distraction.
The Fallout:
The Streisand Effect is in full swing. The more he ignores the obvious, the louder the noise gets. If UNC struggles under him, the story won’t be Can he rebuild?—it’ll be Was this ever about football?
The Lesson:
Silence isn’t strategy. A single candid interview—“Yes, my life looks different now. Let’s talk football”—could reset the narrative. But until then? The legend risks looking out of touch with his own legacy.
BLAKE LIVELY’S CALCULATED OMISSION
The Mistake:
At the 2025 Time100 Gala, Lively delivered a speech about her mother’s survival of a traumatic attack—a powerful moment, but one that conspicuously sidestepped her own legal battle with co-star Justin Baldoni (whom she’s accused of sexual harassment). Many online commentators felt that her decision to co-opt fellow honoree Gisele Pelicot’s story came across as a little cringe. (Watch me take in Blake Lively’s speech in real time on last week’s PR Breakdown Live on YouTube.)
The Double Down:
By framing criticism as cruelty rather than addressing the timing of her speech, Lively turned advocacy into deflection. The optics worsened when she and Ryan Reynolds posted a lighthearted Wrexham selfie hours later—fueling accusations of performative gravitas.
The Fallout:
The internet split: Was this a genuine tribute or a strategic pivot? Either way, the Baldoni case—which she refused to name—became the only thing people discussed.
The Lesson:
Moral licensing (I’m a good person, so my motives can’t be questioned) is a PR trap. If you’re in a hole, stop digging. Address the controversy or stay silent—but don’t weaponize one trauma to bury another.
Podcast: When Silence Backfires: Belichick, Blake & the Draft Day Meltdown
MEL KIPER JR.’S DRAFT-DAY MELTDOWN
The Mistake:
ESPN’s draft guru ranked Colorado QB Shedeur Sanders as a top-5 pick—ignoring glaring flaws in the player’s play and reputation. When Sanders plummeted to the fifth round, Kiper erupted: “The NFL has been clueless for 50 years!”
The Double Down:
Instead of acknowledging misjudgment, Kiper blamed scouts, dismissed structural critiques, and turned analysis into a personal crusade.
The Fallout:
Colleagues pushed back. Fans questioned his objectivity. And the take that was supposed to cement his authority instead became a referendum on his credibility.
The Lesson:
Confirmation bias (I’m right, the data must be wrong) is the enemy of good analysis. The best analysts own their misses—because being wrong is forgivable; refusing to admit it isn’t.
THE COMMON THREAD: WHY WE DIG IN
Ego Protection: Admitting fault feels like weakness.
Sunk Cost Fallacy: I’ve invested too much to quit now.
Cognitive Dissonance: If I’m wrong, who am I?
Audience Capture: This is what my fans expect from me.
But here’s the reality: The longer you deny, the deeper the hole gets.
THE FIX: EVOLUTION OVER EGO
Belichick: Own the new chapter. Silence = speculation.
Lively: Address the Baldoni case or leave it alone. Half-measures backfire.
Kiper: “Here’s where I misjudged Sanders.” Humility beats hubris.
The bottom line? You can’t “Do Your Job” if you’re too busy pretending the job hasn’t changed.
BLUF (BOTTOM LINE UP FRONT):
Whether you’re a Hall of Fame coach, an A-lister, or a draft analyst, the rules are the same:
Face the mistake.
Pivot forward.
Outgrow your own flawed persona.
Or as Belichick himself once put it: “Do your job.” Sometimes, that job is just saying, “I was wrong.”
Oh, and stop digging.
Excellent analysis, per usual.